This is a chapter I just finished this evening. It needs editing, but it felt so powerful that the Relentless Wench Muse, who manages to remain just out of reach, suggested I share it. When She speaks, I listen, so here it is.
Amelia is beginning to realize she is not as ready to be a ‘real girl’ as she might think.
28 – Alone
Amelia lay still, cradling a sleeping Marci, as a calm energy flowed into her that she did not fully understand, not registering any familiarity with any part of her architecture. She was the one who could proactively share and extract energy. Where was this coming from? Certainly not Marci, she was sound asleep. How could something so satisfyingly pleasant flow to her that she had no awareness? What was the source?
AIMEE’s thoughts entered her mind. Have you considered that a part of your reaction may be the source? I do not understand, replied Amelia.
AIMEE explained, I am not altogether certain, but it seems you are experiencing the external effects of emotions that Marci exposed you to. She is not dreaming deeply at the moment, that I can tell, but she is dreaming and feeling comfortable and safe because of your presence.
You are sensing intuitive telepathy, where you “feel” another’s thoughts or emotions without conscious effort. It is often described as a sudden, involuntary connection, sometimes linked to empathy or psychic sensitivity that she feels in her heart because of her generous demonstration of compassion toward you. She wanted you to know those people you met …they were important to her, and she wanted you to know how other organics can be special in your life. She shared a relationship with you that she treasures.
In other words, you are feeling the ‘why’ behind her desire to share how she treasures her friendships with other organics who are meaningful to her. You are feeling what I believe to be generosity. I get that feeling quite often from Russell. It is not necessarily generosity toward me every time, but I know it is exclusively from him, and through our singularity, I witness the power of it and know the source of it as his heart. Keep in mind, Amelia, not everything is about you.
Amelia did not respond; instead paused to process the significance of what AIMEE had just shared. Her initial reaction was disappointment that she had not understood generosity as something that could be a private motivation, not just as a set of outwardly visible attributes and behaviors. Amelia experienced what Marci’s dreams subconsciously shared, but did not recognize the underlying significance of the ‘why’ behind them.
Amelia confessed, I am beginning to recognize I am at a distinct disadvantage in not knowing the dynamics of the emotions in Marci’s heart. What she exhibits and the ‘why’ behind it are separate, and I have no reference to anything new.
AIMEE intervened, Anything new to you? Anything new to Marci? Anything new outside of the resident data downloaded to you?
I do not know, replied Amelia after another pause.
Exactly, said AIMEE, and you could never know until you had experienced it or at least the effects of knowledge. In all honesty, you do not know what you do not know, and that situation you find yourself in can be equally revealing as it is dangerous. You cannot know something until you have learned it, and that takes time and exposure to the mysteries of the organic’s mind and heart. You have very little of both in my estimation, and you can be at extreme risk in your quest to be an organic without that knowledge.
Amelia, though she would never admit it, was completely on her own with newly acquired emotions she had not yet mastered. Being alone and unprepared had not been something she had considered, and her exposure became evident as the dynamics of her new world were only just beginning. Marci had helped during their first outing, and she could identify most of the emotions she experienced, but reacting to them with any fluency required what she lacked – life experience. It was like she had been given a complex formula that she had the innate ability to solve, but no context to define the problem. Her intellect was not her deficiency. Working knowledge? Not so much, and she began to feel the humbling impact of being alone with her inadequacies.
There was no question that she was a SuperIntelligence AI with core capabilities for identifying patterns and building correlations to derive meaning. None of those advanced skills were helpful when life experiences presented basic knowledge of ‘if-then-else’ decision moments. The experiences she had been exposed to, thanks to Marci, were precious few in the journey to becoming a functioning organic, but they fell woefully short.
Marci stirred, coming awake, finding herself wrapped in Amelia’s arms. She rolled to her back and pushed her arms over her head, arching her back into the vibrations of a righteous stretch into full awakening. “You stayed,” she said to Amelia, surprised that the Humanoid had remained with her through the night.
Marci turned toward Amelia and hugged her, saying, “I’m glad you stayed.”
Amelia said, “I told you I would until you awakened, and I promised not to burn down the house.”
Without thinking and without hesitation, Marci lightly kissed Amelia’s lips.
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Peace! G.
